Many of the complaints from some of my girlfriends about their boyfriends is that they aren’t on the same page. He does not understand them and so on. He is not on their level whether it be financially, mentally or in life in general. Which brings me to the question. Are you dating up or down? Let me explain, when I say dating up, I am talking about dating someone who is your equal. Sometimes you think the issue is chemistry, but really it is compatibility.

For instance, you cannot be a superficial women and then seek out a man who will love you for you. Or you cannot be a person who only passes the gym on their way to McDonalds but wants a beef cake. Catch my drift. Of course this does not apply to all cases but it has affected me a time or two. In both cases you would be the one that needs to step your game up. You have to be honest about what you bring to the table and what you expect in return.

Sometimes opposites do attract. However, if there are no meaningful commonalities between the two then the result will be that the relationship will not flourish. In the same token, I find that some women also date down. They find men who they have absolutely nothing in common with and expect a deep connection, but he was never on your level to begin with. By dating down you are running the risk of that person bringing you down as well. Sometimes patience can help a person grow.

There is a balancing act in this equation. There is no one person who is the epitome of perfection. You will always have to work with a person and what you perceive to be their issues, as they will have to do the same for you. The first step is to ask yourself what you can deal with and what you cannot. Always know, believe, and accept one's own worth. Never wait on someone else to determine it for you.